Soul Music

All is quiet as I ready myself for the plunge,
accepting the eye of the storm;
a relief before the next wave crashes over me.
This reprieve has become a familiar friend.

Permeated by the scent of pain, the taxing of my aching body,
I ask the unforgivable question.

Why?

On the floor, curled into myself,
a babe asking for comfort.
Warmth flows out of me, a sea of heat,
a stifling, choking hand.

Sucking in gasps, I lose myself.
The beast has won my body,
and it ravages.

Tearing through me, it eclipses my control.
I can no longer stop my tears.
Sobs shake my broken body.

It is this moment of abdication that I truly surrender.
The suffering, though master of my body, loses my spirit.
Even as I weep through the pain, I rejoice;
this is not my permanent temple.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
One day, I will break free.

This is my soul music.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am frustratingly unable to give music for this partly because it was inspired by sections of several pieces, two of them composed/improvised by my fiancé. I will share those so that you may choose one (or all, as I did), if you so desire. If you read it once with each piece, you will understand, I hope, a different level of the poem.



Of this piece, it is the prelude which inspired - in fact, a particular 28 seconds of it:


I don't even know if you can access this one without a soundcloud account, but it was the original inspiration; the others were extensions.